10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• Welcome to kicker school
• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare
• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• A great poker player knows when he is playing poorly.